My First Posture Lessons

       I decided to wear the iPosture device to a lecture I was attending last night. I had several good reasons to think this would be a good environment to try it for the first time.

       First, in case I was electrocuted (which, I admit, seemed unlikely), I would be in a very public place where I was likely to get help from someone other than Tom (a possible, but also unlikely, co-conspirator).

       Second, I got a sore back after attending the theatre over the weekend, due in part to twisting and slouching in my uncomfortable seat. I didn't want this to happen again, and hoped the iPosture would help.

       Third, in case the lecture was boring, any vibration, electric shock or even electrocution might actually be a welcome distraction.

       The device fit easily on my bra strap, and surprisingly, could hardly be seen under my sweater.  Once it was on, the instructions told me to stand up erect "in a good, comfortable posture" and then to briefly press on the device's iPosture logo. Once activated, apparently the iPosture would vibrate when I slouched.

       I could see a problem already. What if I didn't stand up straight enough? What if what I thought of as good posture was really pretty poor posture? I remember that when the personal trainer commented on my posture last year, I was actually trying to stand up straight -- without being overly fake about it.

       And to confuse things more, the iPosture instructions advised against using a very strict posture. "Good posture is about feeling confident and tall (hmmmm...) not over-arched, stiff and inflexible."

       It sounded like I might need a real, live, posture coach just to get me started. Still, I stood up straight -- but not too straight -- and pressed the logo. The device vibrated briefly under my finger, to let me know it was ready to judge me.

       Then I walked around and waited. And I waited some more. And I tried to stand casually. And I waited. And nothing happened.

      I checked the instructions again and read that the iPosture would vibrate after about 60 seconds of poor posture -- not simply every time one moved about or bent slightly or slouched for a moment -- which probably is a good thing. I had envisioned a nearly constant reminder to stand up straight -- kind of like my ballet teacher hassling me as a child.  

       Still, to ensure the device was actually functional, I bent deeply over my laptop for maybe a minute, and eventually felt a subtle vibration and heard a small buzz, telling me that I was indeed bent over. So I knew it worked, sort of. It was at least an iDon'tBendOver.

       So I proceeded to prepare to go out. And I discovered some useful posture-related things about myself along the way.

       First, I found it difficult to brush my teeth while maintaining good posture. But I received no vibration/buzz while brushing because it seems that I don't brush my teeth for the 60 seconds required to activate the device. This, of course, raises questions about my dental hygiene. Indeed, Dental Health Magazine advises that proper tooth brushing takes at least two minutes, or 120 seconds. 

       Second, I learned that I definitely slouch while sitting on the toilet, and that I do spend at least the requisite 60 seconds at that task. Bzzzzzzzzzzzz.

       With that useful information in mind, and an empty bladder, I headed out the door to my lecture...